Fear Not, God is With Us

I’ve just lost another battle. I became another person who’s strength came up short, frightened and started to feel worthless. Presumably the way I live my life inevitably. Even the strongest people aren’t immune to fears and anxieties. It may be typical to occasionally have intrusive thoughts especially in these trying times. Or when you’re trapped in a situation you would least want to happen and you stop breathing for a short while. Times when the world is not even confident of what lies ahead. So much disturbances and crises happening – pandemic, natural disasters, racism and violence, crimes, terrorism, economic uncertainties, unemployment, conflicts and misunderstandings, divisions, death. We made a cruel world. There’s now too little kindness. Too little caring. Too much hate, anger, hurt and fear. A shedload of second thoughts. We fear for our safety, we fear for our future, our children’s future, fear for our families, fear for our financial stability, we even fear of what other people think, we fear of being judged and misunderstood, we fear for tomorrow. And the list goes on.

The likelihood of worrying of something that has not happened and spending so much time assuming or thinking about highs and lows, ifs and buts, habitual skepticism and fear of the unknown is the real enemy. It’s the most popular weapon of the demon. We even see the tests and trials differently as God’s punitive measures. But how many times did we easily worry and abandon our faith on his promises and give up on God’s favours? How hard is it to stay fearless and fight for the things and even the people we care about? Have we forgotten that God puts and shapes his servants through trials? We have always wanted our lives to glorify God but there is something we have missed. When God used people to show his power, did he use comfort or trials? The answer is trials—God’s most used tool. And so why do we become so worried and troubled to face and conquer the trials. Why do we even choose to endure them on our own? We should believe that we must never question God’s plans. But we have forgotten that we can always pray and ask for God’s support, guidance and most of all, forgiveness. He can come in between and keep the chain firm and impenetrable. But oftentimes, we give up just like that. We stop and quit holding onto God’s blessings. If we want to be used by God for his glory, we must be prepared for trials. I have to admit, there have been times I was attacked by the dickens. When I feel all alone for the most part. I became frail and easily damaged. The prince of darkness has won against my silent outcry of God’s presence. I should have known myself better. I should have committed to his plans and will. I should have trusted what God can do. I should have been unfailing that with faith, not only does God not want me to worry, but He wants me to put my worries onto Him to deal with. He will take that burden away from me. No earthly troubles can hurt me because God is always with me.

Isaiah has reminded me that we might feel afraid, but we must believe that God is with us – 41:10 “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. We may not be in control, but we can trust the One who is. – 14:24 “The Lord of hosts has sworn: “As I have planned, so shall it be, and as I have purposed, so shall it stand.” We may not know what the future brings, but we can know the God who does. – 45:7 “I form light and create darkness, I make well-being and create calamity, I am the Lord, who does all these things.”

In times that we feel afraid, some turn to music, recreation or books as sources of inclination to escape from routine or emotional difficulties but let us not forget that we can always turn to God and the Scripture. In fact, if we put in our hearts and mind that we can always depend on God whenever we’re attacked by the enemy, we are winning. It’s an instant triumph over the attacker. Let’s focus on the positive things around us. Let’s listen to positive thoughts and not with the whisper of the demons. Let’s look forward to better days that’s coming. Let’s keep the faith in God’s promises. Pray out loud. There’s nothing prayer can deliver. There’s nothing more powerful than the Scripture. There is power through them because they are God’s words. His words are forever and permanent, it will withstand the test of time. It will calm our spirits. It will cleanse, nourish and guide us through our days. God is here to remind us that we are never alone, and that anxiety will not last forever. Anxiety and fear will never win against Him. 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” For as much as we worry, we’re not actually built for it. God wants us to love ourselves and fear not.

The Rain Has Fallen

I love rain.

I even count the days until rainy season gracefully comes forth. There’s melancholy and solitude whenever I hear the rhythm of the falling rain and thunder. I have always found the rain very calming. The coldness it fulfills gives me a play of emotions and a look back when my mom used to snuggle my tiny flesh when I was little. The smell of the rain yields a connection how the grounds or dry lands has long-desired what the heavens has sent. God sends rain as part of his blessing to all people. It’s a common grace and goodness, both for the saved and the unsaved. As written in Psalm 147:8, ‘He covers the heavens with clouds; he prepares rain for the earth; he makes grass grow on the hills.’ It is God who causes to rain or not to rain. It is God who set the heavens in place, it is God who causes the mountain to grow grass. God is in control of everything. The rain is the love of sky for earth. They don’t meet face to face but sends genuine love this way. I also relish watching how a raindrop clings to a weak leaf and eventually slips downward, takes a fall because the leaf can no longer uphold the droplet. It’s like an expression of trust and courage. A strength to carry on in spite of danger. Whenever rain comes, I let the rain kiss me. I allow it to tap upon my head with silver liquid drops. It’s God-given. It makes me feel good inside.

But time and again, rain amounts to being sullen. Our lives may become cloudy and we battle with inner disturbances. There are days when we experience darkness. We become thin papers that tears and breaks after we’re soaked and washed away. And then we get stale and we deteriorate. Oftentimes, we see rain as an upcoming storm. It can be gruesome. Too much, we drown. To little, we thirst. It also represents a sense of foreboding, exemplifying human tears. In essence, it is the also the heavens that allow us to experience this, it delivers us to trials. We go through mental and emotional torment or feeling of resentment. Jeremiah 14:22 tells us, ‘Do any of the worthless idols of the nations bring rain? Do the skies themselves send down showers? No, it is you, Lord our God. Therefore our hope is in you, for you are the one who does all this.’ God sends rain but still reminds us to see his grace and set our eyes to the good even during darkness and trials. He uses trials for His glory and uses rain for us to grow.

The sterling drops of rain implies how the sky has first turned dark before a downpour of clear waters. But the rain is the only way to get dark clouds to go away. It’s a perfect manifestation that we should keep moving, to turn over a new leaf and blossom in time. It is God’s testimony that hopes are in full bloom. As the wise saying goes, April showers bring May flowers. And Leviticus 26:4 says, ‘I will send you rain in its season, and the ground will yield its crops and the trees their fruit.’ Rain is referred to as a blessing after a drought. It reminds me of the moment I asked God to help me grow. And then it started raining.

I used to love rain.

I thought I couldn’t unlove you. But it has finally come to an end after a weighty awakening and ample opportunities of waiting. The rain has washed away the thoughts inside. I will now just be, I used to love the rain. Not because I no longer long for God’s blessings but I will start living through all His favour, grace and protection. Acceptance of something undesirable but inevitable is now bending forward. I harbour prejudice with the warmth of the sun but things have changed. The sun rises everyday and this time, I promise to lay my eyes on it and accept gladly the golden rays it brings. The rain that I used to ardently await will now be reversed into something that I now despise to anticipate. I will now stop longing for the rain to come. The euphony of the rain and thunder shall now be disconnected and separated from everything I used to imagine. Rain now makes me fear the future and even brings irrational anguish. I used to look upon the rain as the bravest thing God has ever created. They aren’t afraid to fall. But nothing feels braver if you aren’t afraid of anything as God is with us always. My love and resemblance with the rain has finally come to an end. You are not brave if you’re scared of what tomorrow brings. I shall welcome and accept new trials and fighting chances because God will walk with me unfailingly. There were times when I earnestly pray and yearn for someone or something to a great degree. Days and opportunities that I say no to end. Yet again, if truth be told, things will now be different. I will finally stop building castles in the air. I used to love it. I used to cherish every amount of time until my eyes are opened, I have been unfavourably holding on to undivided purpose and missing the whole idea of what the warmth of the sun also brings.

I am not looking forward for the rain to fall again. I will chase for unfamiliar things to count on and give myself of what I genuinely deserve. The chances were amenable but they were abandoned and were given little to no attention. I guess that’s my inescapable fate. I have lost hope. Tiny raindrops didn’t fall from the sky, but it has fallen from my eyes. God keeps track of all my tears. And has collected them in His bottle, as written Psalm 56:8. But I am convinced that there are still plenty of others that it’ll fulfill happiness and euphoria when the rain is around. That’s of greater importance to me now. I will be constantly filled with gratitude for all the wonderful days you left me. In days gone by, when the rain comes I come out happily and play under. But things being what they are, I now stop and run for shade. I’m seated at this moment watching the rain that has fallen. But I’m no longer euphoric. I’m no longer burning with excitement. I’m longing for the the sun to come out and the rain to stop. I have lost the soft spot and extreme yearning for the rain to come again. The sun after the rain is much beautiful than the sun before the rain. It will now be down the memory lane. Hopes that the sun will always come out. The nicest thing about the rain is that it always stops. Eventually.

You’ve been a rainbow. Thank you for the great days and the times you made my heart and life meaningful and colourful.

2 Samuel 23:4 ‘And he shall be as the light of the morning, when the sun rises, even a morning without clouds; as the tender grass springing out of the earth by clear shining after rain.’